In case you are wondering, Honeymoon Haven does not have a current location, that I am aware of, but then again I am out of the Honeymoon-game and even if I was in the honeymoon-game, I would not frequent an establishment called Honeymoon Haven for honeymooning. Although I guess, I do frequent an establishment that was formerly called Honeymoon Haven but currently called the Pocono Environmental Education Center (PEEC for those in the know). It is not a real sexily named place, although I suppose some find the environment exciting.
Anyway, I’ve totally lost the plot, yet, again.
Since it is going to be very, very cold and the schedule requires me to be inside and outside and then inside again and outside yet again and on and on for 14 hours straight, until I can take to my sleeping bag and camp mattress, I need to prepare a full capsule wardrobe of wool and turtlenecks and underthings and long things and short things.
If you recall, I love packing capsule wardrobes for all my excursions! Layering is the key to mastering the elements. But when the forecast is for “feels like a blast freezer” temperatures, layering becomes tricky because you must ensure all your layers fit underneath your NorthFace parka, while also ensuring you are able to move because you might hike 4 miles up a mountain to gaze upon the blast freezer below!
You also must prepare for all moods and vibes. Like, will I be channeling “I’ve worn these clothes to trek through Alaska in February” or “I just went to Athleta and bought everything during the year-end sale,” or “I am wearing the woolen sweater my Nana made me in 1999 and it is vintage camp,” or “I am homeless, stop judging me.”
SO MANY DECISIONS!
It requires 3 hours of trying on everything in my closet, becoming disgusted by everything, throwing things around, and then overpacking for 48 hours at Honeymoon Haven where everyone is doing their best to never make eye contact. (Which probably happened a lot at Honeymoon Haven back in the day!) Chloe is doing her own packing--trying on several stocking hats and intermittently shouting "I DON'T KNOW WHICH HAT TO BRING" and earlier she was screaming "I have too many pants." (I tried to tell you can never have too many pants! )
At press time, I have 3 woolen sweaters, 7 pairs of pants (for layering!), several hoodies, my full make-up kit, a curling iron that I will bring for no good reason. By midday tomorrow, this will double and I won't even bother to edit, because I will lose my motivation! Everything will fit into two bags, with bonus sweaters tucked in my car with the spare tire and Chloe can hold my extra shoes on her lap. I can layer my packing as well as my wardrobe!
So, if you need me, I’ll be trying to untangle my outermost layer and asking my dog to sit on my suitcase, so I can zip it. Wish me luck, friends!
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