One of the dark secrets of my daily writing is that my family sometimes hates that I write everyday because they feel it pulls me away from them.
Of course, I am not ignoring my family. I am just doing something else.
They are often doing many other things that don't require my undivided attention. Still, once a week, someone in this house will shout "JUST WRITE YOUR BLOG," will a very resentful emphasis on "BLOG" and really act like they just landed a giant zinger. The first time it happened, I had an indignant Julia Sugarbaker type reaction and said something like, "how dare you. .." with a very stern and husky emphasis on dare.
Now I just ignore them because it really is not my responsibility to provide them with constant and undivided attention. The world often tells parents this is how we are supposed to be. I've seen the posts shaming the mom on the cell phone at the playground not giving her children every moment. Then I've seen the counter posts shaming the shamers saying "you don't know that mom's life! maybe this is the only free time she has!"
But, really who cares? Who has time to watch the mom on the cell phone or to not be on the cell phone or whatever when your children are busy trying to shame you for not watching every single moment of their lives.
Friends, it is healthy to tell your kids to wait a minute. It is fine to say, you know what, I am doing something. It is fine to apologize and say, "Hey, I am sorry, but." It is good for my children to know that I work and read and do things independent of them.
It is also good for my kids to know that I am always here--even when my attention is elsewhere. Sometimes important things come up. Other times they are ready to talk about something that has been weighing on them. And, then, when they say, "Hey mom, this is important" or "I needed to talk to you about something," then I'll drop everything, always. I want them to also learn discernment and good communication and asking for the things they need from the people in their lives.
So, sometimes I ask them to wait. Other times, they tell me that they cannot, so they don't.
But, when my children say "JUST WRITE YOUR BLOG" in response to me asking them to pick up the food trash and cups in their room, I go ahead and write it. I think they can handle some trash pick-up without being traumatized by their mother writing a blog.
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