I'd never pass a lie detector test. (Day 38, Year 3)

This is a picture of me, at the bank, waiting to see if the FBI was coming to investigate me for money laundering. I am NOT laundering money--I can barely launder my socks--however while I was opening up a business account today for my business (yes, apparently I own a business, reluctantly) the bank manager asked me questions that I thought were jokes, but were serious. Apparently some of my answers triggered additional questions. 

Also, isn't my hair STILL CUTE? I did my signature look again today! 

Okay, anyway, the first question was "do you plan on accepting funds from foreign entities?"

My answer was: "OF COURSE! I'll TAKE MONEY FROM ANYONE."

Then the next question was "do you plan on paying foreign entities?"

My answer was: "OF COURSE IF I OWE THEM MONEY I AM NOT A DEAD BEAT."

Next, "Do you plan on laundering money?"

Me: "OF COURSE!" 

This is where things got confusing and the bank manager stepped out of the room for a very long time. 

Of course, the FBI never came and I am probably not on a watch list. But every time I go into a bank or a post office or the passport office or pharmacy or hospital or any government like place I always feel like I am about to be arrested for a white collar crime!

Why am I like this? 

The bank manager came back a few minutes, as a result of my screaming. A man across the street fell off a ladder. Apparently, he falls off everyday and everyday someone at the bank screams. 

I don't even know why I am telling you this; except this is a very typical day for me. I find the world to be both marvelous and baffling. I don't actually know how people truly move through the world without episodes involving white collar crime confusion or witnessing men falling off ladders. 

Like, do people just wake up and do the things they are supposed to do and get on with it? 

Other events today: I asked for a recommendation for graduate school and the recommender said yes (hopefully I don't disappoint them and shame their recommendation. Although I am sure I will in some way! I've been kicked out of many things!); I also wrote somethings and thought of somethings and pulled some data about some emails and pitched some work and talked to a man named Nelson about some other work. 

Then I went to Walmart and started a bit of a fight in the pharmacy line. I was getting my dog's insulin ($29, no script needed! DOWN WITH THE MAN!) and there was only one person in front of me at the register, so I stood behind them. Then suddenly there was a rush of people from the north and the east and the west and the south and the northeast and southeast and northwest, but no one from the southwest, who all lined up in the roped off queue. 

Anyway, the first person in that queue called me a "LINE CRASHER" and tried to move my cart out of the way and get in front of me. So I had to announce that I WAS A SMALL BUSINESS OWNER WITH A DIABETIC DOG WHO WAS RECENTLY CLEARED OF MONEY LAUNDERING CHARGES. 

This had no emotional impact on them, but they were confused and simply started fighting amongst themselves. I got my dog's insulin and ran out of there, before I could be accused of stealing prescription drugs. 

I wasn't stealing them (I have a receipt!!); but I FELT LIKE I WAS!! 


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