Time to Distractedly Renovate! (Day 319, Year 2)

Company is coming, friends! Which is exciting because no one ever visits us, except for that mouse, which our cat killed. Don't worry, we only kill our human guests with kindness! I also like to make sure guests are comfortable. And I know, I know, no one wants anyone "to go to too much trouble."

But, I've stayed with people who don't "go to to too much trouble" and I would NOT recommend it. 

When you have guests, you have to go to all the trouble! Clean your home, organize your clutter and make sure you deal with all lingering anxiety and mental issues, so your guests don't have to text their friends and ask for help escaping your asylum. And you don't want a bad family review! Family members might forget your birthday, but they will never forget a bad visit. 

Whenever we have overnight visitors I like to do a mini-manic renovation of the home. This mini renovation ends up costing at least as much as an official renovation and includes lots of things that require drilling and lifting. There is also odd cleaning. Like, once, I scrubbed the grout in places no one could see just to get out my energy. I should have used that energy to fold some laundry, but instead I just shoved the laundry in a closet that company is not allowed in. 

Note to company: don't be noisy and look in closets! 

Yesterday, after a particularly trying Monday, I took up painting a room (which is complete!). After I finished the edges and trim today, I decided to seize the day (and night!) and paint my desk. Our guests will most likely not be using my desk. But, you never know! Maybe they have a blog they write in every night!

Then I decided to organize the books by size (in case our guests are affected by books not organized by size). I also got distracted by all sorts of fun photos--like one of me in a rather phallic balloon hat looking as horrified as one should in a rather phallic balloon hat. I might frame this and place it on the guest room bedside table (which I have to purchase tomorrow at Home Goods). There is also a clown and my husband in the photo. I think it was taken at the world famous PUB in Pennsuaken. I used to spend my childhood birthdays there with my grandparents. 

Speaking of which, I found my great, great grandfather's obituary. His name was Tom and the year he died he never took one sick or vacation day from his job. The obit author wrote this as everyone should be jealous of dead Tom with unused PTO. 

I am upset on his behalf! And I wonder if I can get his PTO as his heir? My older cousins and my mother might fight me for it. But finders keepers, right?

Guys! I completely forgot this blog was about renovations! 

Anyway, tomorrow the cleaners are coming at some undisclosed time (hopefully not in the morning, because then they will have to help renovate and reminisce). I sitll have lots to do, like find clean sheets and unpack my suitcase from our Hurricane trip. And find matching pillow cases. Cleaning for the cleaners is absolutely one of the most bizare things I do, but I cannot stop. As part of this process, I am trying to gather all the throw pillows I have and then make a list of all the throw pillows I don't have. This will make me feel inadequate as a woman and I will spend tomorrow sourcing the corect throw pillows, while on a conference call and then race home to hand deliver them to the cleaners for proper placement and fluffing. 

Of course, our guests don't arrive for several days after the cleaning, which gives me more time to mini-renovate (and get distracted!) and chase the children around with a broom. I am off to organize my various awards and trophies in a way that screams "successful" but whispers "humble."