I have a ridiculous work to do list. And today, I nearly had at least 15 breakdowns. I definitely whined. And I definitely rolled my eyes.
Oh and there was huffing.
And then there was one ugly time, when I yelled at my children, like a lunatic, "I HAVE WORK STRESS." I shouted this in a strange voice I did not recognize that sounded silently belligerent and two-drinks-in, although I was totally sober, which made it all the more strange.
My list is enormous. And there is nothing anyone can do about it. It is my list. And the thing is, stuff is going to fall off the list. It just has to, because even me--the maker of unreasonable lists and the bender of time and the fit-it-all-in-professional--knows that what I want to accomplish by 10 am tomorrow is completely and utterly unreasonable.
ARGHHH!! This annoys me so much! I am not one to quit at anything (except my several part-time jobs I had in high school. I did not like working at a drug store! Or a grocery store. Or that coffee place.).
I am one, however, to procrastinate at everything. This is in direct opposition to my fit-it-all-in attitude; but it does explain why I've learned how to bend time.
In fact, I just took an hour-plus break to solve all the problems of the world and discuss vaccination history with my friend. My husband is definitely wondering what the heck I am doing.
(I am writing my blog! The break is part of the process, obviously!).
So what is a procrastinator who is also a fit-it-all-in-professional do to when faced with an unreasonable list? Do I prioritize the list? Do I stay up all night? Do I continue to panic and yell insane things? Do I call another friend to discuss race relations and then maybe call a former colleague in Australia (it's morning there!) to catch up? Do I feign an illness and take a sick day (can't do that in the face of COVID, everyone will assume I have the Rona!)? Do I meditate and refocus my energy?
I've considered all these things. (and I've begun to do most of them. . )
But, really, there is only one thing to do: go grab a glass of wine, watch Big Brother and hang out with my husband. Because the thing I know as a procrastination and fit-it-all-in-professional: the list will be there tomorrow; but tonight will be gone and well, accomplishment is great; but real life is better.