I had a bit of a do nothing day today, which is different than a monotonous day when there is nothing do. A do nothing day is a day when I purposely and consciously choose to do nothing I don't have to; and just sort of find spare time to do whatever.
A do nothing day is not necessarily a lazy day or a day spent on the couch--it is just a day when my ambition level is low, which in turn lowers my stress level and leaves me feeling that oozy relaxing sense of having been at a spa.
I think the actual term for how I feel is contentment.
And for me, at least, having a do nothing day of contentment only comes after days of intense doing everything--work, cleaning, cooking, planning, talking, socializing (remotely!) and driving kids everywhere. My work week was busy, my day "off" on Friday was busy, my Saturday was busy and today, well, it wasn't.
Sure, I woke up, went to church in my living room, then realized I had made a scheduling error and had to miss a meeting over Nick's soccer, but no worries, I had no ambition today of making multi-tasking work, I just sent my apologies and went to soccer. Then came home. I ate some lunch and read my book and limited my contact with the outside world and made some orzo salad and chatted on the phone with my in-laws and now, the kids, who are still living in a world before Daylight Savings Time kicked, are getting ready for bed and their school/sports week ahead. A lot happened today, but compared to another day, nothing happened.
I still have this blog to finish, my abs to do and my meditation. But, I feel totally content and not in any rush. I am totally positive there is a bevy of unanswered texts on my phone and I know my work in-box is bursting from my day off on Friday. A tiny part of me wants to check on what's happening; but that would kill the do nothing vibe--and I think I need that vibe to get through the week ahead.
Contentment is weird emotion for me. It is different than happiness--happiness comes from doing everything and nothing and all the things and none of the things. But contentment comes from being satisfied and happy and not having real-time ambition to do something more. Contentment requires a certain kind of self-confidence that everything is going to be fine and accepting that whatever you are doing in the moment is the only thing you need to be doing. Contentment requires presence and does not look to the past nor does it worry about the future. Contentment reminds me of the times when my babies fell sound asleep on my chest and our breaths united.
Contentment is hard (especially because there are no babies around for me to snuggle; however the picture above of Lily and Nicholas and Chloe off to the side, does fill me with memories of contentment.).
Tonight, when I began writing this do nothing day ramble, I thought that I'd use the time to check back on the goals I sent in my very first post of 2021--I haven't looked in a while and I know there are plenty of things I might be forgetting. But, you know, what, that would mess with my contentment. That list will be there for tomorrow or whenever.
For now, I am firmly rooted, right in my spot and content.